If the Easter Bunny was Cinderella's Fair Godmother

So Cinderella had a cute little hooded chubby cheeked Fair Godmother. A wonderful woman who inspired her to be more than she thought she could be so that she could see the beauty and magic of love and all that jazz. Got the picture - Bippity Boppity Boo?

And then, one day the Easter bunny decided that he wanted in on the action and delivered not a pumpkin that turned into a carriage but an egg that gave birth to these bad boys right here.







Wow right? Instead of words all you hear are screams of horror from every skirt someone tries to pair with these monsters, whimpers from the jeans some girl thinks would be adorable with this hideous patent pleather.

I ask you, where did we stray? When did $40 of Payless addiction become this type of hell!?